How Do Women Seek Revenge?
I had the fortune of discovering some really good writers in psychoanalysis. I had read women seek three modes of revenge. This deduction was based on professional female clinical evidence. First, women suffer. Second, they seduce, and thirdly they repeat through identification.
The two main elements I want to talk about are seduction and repeating through identification. Seduction can be one of the most effective tools used in destroying objects in terms of female sexuality and the use of their sex. One therapist said women who chose that method are usually, not always, physically attractive. In one psychoanalysts opinion, the seducer presents as needing protection. She presents as extraordinarily vulnerable and delicate. She needs saving and the analyst gets the idea she can and should be the patient’s savior. When this happens, the analyst reports she ends up “loving her patient too much" and then the patient “kills her off.” I sometimes think this is exactly the cycle for some impoverished intimate relationships. A cycle I term “Help Me! — Fuck You!” cycle of abuse. Of course, much needs to be analyzed in an individual and family dynamic. Armchair diagnoses should be avoided. I only write about what I’ve read.
It’s no secret women have been using seduction even before Egyptian belly dancers danced their way into the courts of kings. Seduction, it turns out is as dynamic in psychoanalysis with discernable characteristics. Namely, an idealized attraction to the therapist followed by killing the therapist off.
What’s The Problem With Seduction As A Way To Get Even?
Absolutely nothing if your a rogue international spy keeping the security of your nation intact. It’s exhausting business. And it should be noted there’s a difference between playing a seductive role for bedroom entertainment purposes and fixed unconscious fantasy born out of psychosis. The problem with libido is it all goes into becoming “lovable" and no libido gets invested in loving the object of desire. It tends to, almost guarantees, a rather dry and colorless life as these women are rarely sexy with no energy left to love the object. Babies need to be loved, but grown adults, for a happy meaningful life, need to love and be loved in return. So, it helps a lot not becoming too invested in people who wish to “kill you off.”
Another problem is seductive people are really imprisoned in their own narcissism and tend to grow very ungracefully old. But the most fascinating and creative way that a woman gets even is by identifying with the object and the psyche triangulation of Mother-Father-Self is deeply entrenched and implicated in this tendency. We, and I mean woman, use their parental imagos in all sorts of interesting ways, but one of the most useful is to express aggression more or less unconsciously. Women seem to act out their rage in unconscious identification with either one or other of the parent. This is not to say this can’t hold true for men as well.
